Rare Monsters

   The slide rock bolter is a fearsome critter from Colorado. It’s whale like in shape and size, in spite of being an entirely land based creature. On the ends of its tail fins are hooks that allow it to grab onto mountain ridges. It has tiny eyes and a large gaping mouth, much like a sculpin. The bolter also constantly drools out an oily slippery saliva that surrounds it. The slide rock bolter lives only on the steepest cliff sides, ones that are over 45 degrees. There it remains in wait, hanging high up on the cliff side watchful for its prey. The slide rock bolter’s primary prey is tourists, although it will eat practically any creature it catches unaware. When it spots prey in the valley bellow it lets go of the cliff with its tail hooks and slides down the side of the mountain like an avalanche, flattening anything in its way and leave and trail of destruction. Helping the slide rock bolter slide down the hillside is the ample drool it left behind before, as this a...

 The dingbat was a fearsome critter from the local folklore of the western Great Lakes region. It’s origin was a taxidermied mash up of different animals that was displayed in the Friendly Buck-horn Tavern in Rice Lake, Wisconsin. The dingbat had the head of some small predatory mammal, often some sort of mustelid, the body of a bird of prey, and the antlers of a young buck. The legend of the dingbat states that it revelled in making the life of hunters difficult. The dingbat would whinny like a horse just as a hunter was about to take a shot at a buck, breaking his concentration and making him miss. If that didn’t work, the dingbat was capable of flying at incredible speeds and capturing the bullet mid air. The dingbat fed on bullets and gasoline, which it would drink from the hunter’s truck, leaving him stranded. The dingbat was a humorous way for hunters to explain why they had bad luck on a hunt or came back empty handed. The Friendly Buck-horn Tavern had several taxi...

  The hellidid is one of the fearsome critters of American folklore. Unlike most other fearsome critters, it’s found in the deserts of the south west. It is a chimeric monster with the head of an ant eater, the body of a zebra and four ostrich like legs, and a fluffy tail. The hellidid primarily ate fibrous plants, such as yuccas. It would use its long, serrated tongue to lick at the plants, scraping off the soft bits and leaving the fibre within the leaves behind. The hellidid was also extremely shy and would run off, allowing only quick glimpses of the creature. However, at night it would approach travellers sleeping out in the open and use its rough tongue to lick all the hair off their heads, leaving them shaved in the morning. Obviously the legend of the hellidid was part of a prank cowboys would play on greenhorns and people who overslept, shaving their heads, and blaming it on the hellidid. Sources https://www.deviantart.com/monstrumamericanum/art/Hellidi...

  The Grand Lake hoedag is a fearsome critter from St Mary’s Ohio, not to be confused with the more famous Wisconsin hodag. It was said to be a lake monster, albeit one that was completely different from the typical plesiosaur / Nessie type. The hoedag was said to be a one of a kind, female creature, not a species. It appeared in news articles from 1912 to the 1960’s, and was never meant to be taken seriously. The hoedag was the size and shape of a giraffe. She had fur on her body and a combination of feathers and porcupine quills on her neck. Her body was covered in a cow spot pattern and had a camel like hump on her back. Her front legs were long like a chicken’s and her back legs were short like a pigs. Both sets of legs ended in plate shaped feet, which were capable of moving over mud and water plants without sinking in. On her head she had a singular green eye, partly covered by cow licked bangs. Her tail stuck up in the air like a flagpole and at the end of it was a red eye. ...

The Funeral Mountain Terrashot is a fearsome critter from American folklore. The legend of this creature was used to explain the name of the Funeral Range in California. The terrashot was a six to eight foot long beast. It had a coffin shaped structure on its back. It also had long wobbly legs, which caused it to sway with uncertainty with every step it took. The creatures would spend most of their lives up high in the mountain meadows, grazing on the alpine grass. There they would gradually increase in number. Some unknown compulsion would cause the terrashots to all leave their mountain homes at once and travel through Death Valley. They would all travel down from the mountains in a single line. One by one each of the terrashots would bloat and explode in the heat, leaving behind a grave shaped pit. Even after witnessing the previous member in front of them die, the next terrashot would not be convinced to turn away. It would proceed onto its death in the exact same manner. It was un...

  The quidnunce is one of the fearsome critter of American folklore. It's a small mammal that lives underground. It has the head of a tapir, the arms of a burrowing tortoise, the hind legs of a kangaroo and a bushy tail. Its strangest feature is a unicorn horn growing out of its back. This horn causes the quidnunce to be trapped in place within its underground burrow. It can be trapped for years at a time, being freed only by luck. It's unknown how the quidnunce survives in these conditions, but it does. The quidnunce is found in the midwest of America.  The quidnunce can easily be freed by a human digging it out. However the quidnunce will not be grateful for this act. Instead it will attack it's freer with it's claws and back horn. While the quidnunce is small it's mighty enough to kill a man. So it's advised if you ever find a quidnunce to leave it in place. The quidnunce is truly a miserable creature.

  The jimplecute is a vampiric reptile from Ozark legend. It is a rarely heard of fearsome critter and shouldn't be confused with the gowrow, the more famous reptile from the region. There are two different descriptions of the jimplecute. The original appearance is of a long serpentine reptile, yet still baring short legs. It has skin the texture of dead leaves, which allows it to hide better in the forests. It even had the chameleon like ability to change color, so to blend in with leaves of different seasons. This jimplecute is able to wrap around its victims like a python to immobilize them while it feeds on their blood. The more modern version of the jimplecute is of a vampiric dinosaur, usually something similar to a raptor. This interpretation comes from the book We Always Lie to Strangers by Vance Randolph, which is a book about Ozarks folklore. There Mr Randolph describes the jimplecute as a prehistoric. Although I think he meant that all reptiles are primitive in his e...

  The billdad is a fearsome critter from lumberjack lore. It's a hybrid of bird and beaver with a little kangaroo thrown in too. It has the head of a hawk or eagle. It's front legs are short and taloned like the back legs of an eagle. It has a fur covered mammalian body, long, jumping kangaroo legs that end in webbed beaver feet and a beaver tail. The billdad is found only in Boundary pond, a small lake in Maine. There the billdad would hunt for fish. It did this by waiting on the shore for a fish to surface while hunting insects. Then the billdad would leap just past the fish and slam it's tail down onto the surface of the water, knocking the fish out. The billdad could then collect up the fish and eat it as its leisure. It was said that large billdads could cover a length of 60 yards in one leap. Billdads were secretive animals and more often seen then heard. Their tail slaps making a distinct sounds like someone slapping the water with a oar. In spite of having a very ...

  The snawfus is a pure white stag with flowering branches for antlers and supernatural abilities. It comes from the folklore of the Ozarks and is found in Arkansas and Missouri. The snawfus is associated with the cool misty winters of the region. It was said to be the origin of the blue haze which shrouded the Ozark mountains in the wintertime by breathing out clouds of blue mist. Legends most often speak of their only being one snawfus, unlike many fearsome critters which are treated like species. Instead the snawfus is more like a spirit, and guardian of the Ozarks' wilderness. The snawfus was much larger than the average buck, being more akin to an elk in size. Yet in spite of this, it was far more swift than any regular deer, to the point it couldn't be captured or shot down by any means. The snawfus was also able to jump up into the canopy of the forest and walk along the branches. In spite of its size the snawfus could perch on the smallest of twigs. Sometimes it just ha...

  The hodag is a fearsome critter from lumberjack folklore, a hoax perpetrated by a businessman trying to advertise his resort, and the beloved mascot of Rhinelander Wisconsin. The hodag looks like a giant, green, hairy beast, with a short bulldog face and prominent tusks. The hodag has bull like horns on it's head and a row of spikes running down it's back. It has a long reptilian tail, tipped with a spike at the end. The legend of the hodag starts in 1893 with resort owner Eugene Shepard. He created the hodag as a hoax to stir up interest in the area around Rhinelander so people would visit his resort. Mr. Sheperd reported that he and a group of hunters had a battle in the forest with the vicious hodag. They had fought off the beast with hunting rifles, hounds and 'poisoned water' in toy squirt guns. All their efforts were to no avail though, until one of the hunters finally killed the hodag by throwing a stick of dynamite at it. At first people were intrigued and ...

  The Plat Eye is a ghostly undead monster from America Folklore. It's found along the gulf coast, into Georgia and up into South Carolina. The legend of the plat eye was told primarily among African Americans. The plat eye is a ghostly predatory beast, usually a large cat. Its most distinguishing feature is its single large eye, which glows red. Often all a person will see of the plat eye is its glowing eye staring at them from the darkness. The plat eye's body is pale white or grey, like a lifeless corps. Often its flesh is rotten and its guts are hanging out, furthering the undead appearance.   The plat eye can shape shift into the forms of a headless human, a sickly black calf or a black dog. The plat eye can also appear and disappear at will. Plat eyes haunt bayous and crossroads after midnight, and are never seen in the light of day. They fade out of existence in the sunlight. The plat eye surrounds itself in mist and appears out of the fog. Plat Eyes are the restl...

  The Snallygaster is a monster that sits somewhere between lumberjack folklore and actual cryptid. In spite of it's ridiculous appearance, rivalry with another monster, and humorous stories, people have reported seeing it in earnest, some sightings being as late as the 1930's. The Snallygaster originates near the South Mountain in Maryland, but sightings and legends of it range as far away as West Virginia and Ohio. The Snallygaster looks like a cross between a bird and a dragon. It has large horns on its head. The Snallygaster's strangest and most notable features are having octopus like tentacles and a single glaring eye. Other than this short description the Snallygaster's appearance can varying greatly. Sometimes it has a set of front legs, other times it only has back legs like a wyvern. The Snallygaster's body can be long and twisting like a serpent, or short and squat, with its length being made mostly of its neck and tail. Even the location of its tentacl...

  The Gowrow is a fearsome critter from Arkansas. It's considered a species, rather than one individual. There exists multiple different stories of hunters and locals defeating a troublesome gowrow by differing means and in different locations. It's also said that the females carry their soft shelled eggs around in a throat pouch, implying a breeding population. The gowrows are giant reptilian monsters. They're 20 feet long from snout to tail and resemble giant lizards or wingless dragons. Gowrows are said to have massive jaws with even larger tusks, either like those of a hippopotamus or a wild boar. They have a row of bony spikes down their backs and long reptilian tails that end in a blade or a spike which they can use as a weapon. Gowrows have strong front arms which they can use to uproot entire trees and dig through solid rock. The feet are usually, but not always, webbed and and the Gowrow is considered a good swimmer. Besides these qualities, the over all body shap...

  The wamp ( Caudasal lakeshorekearni ) is one of the fearsome critters of lumberjack lore. It was a small and peaceful creature. The wamp was about the size of a raccoon and has a salt bag shaped body. It had a long, hollow tail with a salt shaker at the end and it would use this tail to leave salt licks for deer over the winter. Hunters caught wise to this and started following the wamp around to more easily find deer. So the wamp's efforts to help deer ended up in them being hunted down instead. Because April Fools is tomorrow I wanted a feature a light hearted and silly creature this time.